Things you witness only at Starbucks

At first I wasn’t going to write about this, but then I figured why not.

I went to Starbucks today to pick up some coffee. There was one guy in front of me, and he was chatting-up the cashier (a very attractive blond girl in her early twenties), who was really excited by this and kept going on and on. At first I thought it was cute, but shortly after I started getting annoyed as my ride was waiting for me and I just wanted to get my coffee and get out instead of listening to a discussion about how much he spends at Starbucks every week (which also made me wonder how much I spend and that was something I definitely didn’t want to think about).

I guess I looked kind of angry because the guy tells me: “Maaaan.. ya’ look like ya’ hadda bad day at work tad-day”.

-“Well, actually, I don’t work” I replied, while trying to hint the cashier with my stares that I am ready to order.

– “Oh, yeah? Wish I didn’t hafta work either. I gotta find me a rich woman”, he said. “I don’t care how fat she is. The fatta’ the betta’. This way she neva’ gonna leave me.”

-My response: “Wow that’s a really good idea. The next girl you meet, you better take her to a lot of dinners and fatten her up. This way she also dies soon and you can get her money”.

-He liked this idea. He then turned to the cashier: “Yeah, gurl, ya’ better find yowself a rich maan too. Ya’ don’t wanna be working here no mo’!”.

-What followed next was even funnier. “I don’t want a rich man”, says the girl.  “I used to date a rich man. My ex-boyfriend was a trust-fund baby. He had all the money in the world. But he didn’t understand me and my needs. He just kept wanting to give me money and thought that was enough”.

-“Come on, gurl, with all the money he has, he don’t need to understand ya’.. ya’ won’t have to be working no mo'”, says the guy once again..

The conversation ended with the girl saying that she has too much of an ego to be doing this and that she doesn’t need someone else’s money and that she can earn her own money. That’s what I call girl power.

I wonder if he will find his fat woman soon…I should get some royalties.